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über Oasis

  • "You pick up your guitar, rip a few people's tunes off, swap them around a bit, get your brother in the band, punch his head in every now and again, and it sells."- Noel Gallagher
  • "We're not arrogant, we just think we're the best band in the world." - Noel
  • "Best Act today. Tomorrow. The day after that. And the day after that. And the day after that." - Noel
  • "If you don't want to be the biggest band in the world, you may as well pack it in." - Noel
  • "I refuse to dance. And I can't dance anyway. I'm not in a band for that. It's about the music and that's it. I'm not an entertainer. But I do entertain people, see what I mean? You don't go to an Oasis gig because the singer's jumping around or because the guitarist does a great fucking windmill. You've seen one of the our gigs you've seen 'em all. But if you're into the music, you'll know that we played better the night before or we can play better." - Liam Gallagher
  • "None of us went to university, none of us went to college, none of us played in a different band before, none of us done anything. We were the last great band to come out of nowhere, on an indie label. We've sold 50 million records. That's still the benchmark. Until someone does what we've done, I'll always consider myself the last big songwriter" - Noel Gallagher
  • "For a six-week period building up to that gig we were the biggest band in the world. We were bigger than, dare I say it, fucking God." - Noel über die Zeit vor dem Knebworth-Gig
  • "If somebody said to me, in twelve years you’ll be in a band with your brother and two carrot munching geezers who don’t like football I would have said fuck off, I’m not joining the Bee Gees." - Noel über Oasis 2005
  • "I don't wanna be in the biggest band in the world anymore, I wanna be the best. And we are the fucking best." - Liam über Oasis 2001 im NME

über die eigenen Platten und Songs

  • "Rockin Chair was going to be on the album, and then I wrote "Wonderwall". So it was "Rockin Chair" or "Wonderwall". Imagine if "Wonderwall" had been a b-side! We wouldn't be sat here now, I tell you that! We'd be in the fucking Falcon in Camden, going, "have you got money for a beer?"" - Noel über die "Roll With It" b-Seite "Rockin Chair"
  • "It's the sound of five men in a studio, on coke, not giving a fuck... The songs are too long and the lyrics are shit and for every milisecond Liam is not singing, there's a guitar riff there in a Wayne's World style." - Noel Gallagher über das dritte Oasis-Album "Be Here Now"
  • "I've laid down better shits on the toilet." - Noel Gallagher noch einmal über das dritte Oasis-Album "Be Here Now"
  • "Well, Fuck That'll Do It which is what Be Here Now should have been called." - Noel über "Be Here Now"
  • "Whatever you needed you got two of. Some ridiculous instrument that you'd fucking seen some guy playin' in a market. I'd phone my manager from Hong Kong at six in the morning. 'What do you want?' 'I want a fucking glockenschplocken.'" - und Noel ein weiteres Mal über die Produktion von "Be Here Now"
  • ""All Around The World" got the chessiest, corniest lyrics ever! Worse than "Whatever"! The Prozac must have been really kicking in when I was writing that!" - Noel über "All Around The World"
  • " The songwriting is gonna change for the next album and "D'you know what I mean" is a hint of what's to come. Gonna get into a bit Welsh rap, get MC Dafydd in the band and rock the valleys!" - Noel wie das Album nach Be Here Now klingen sollte
  • "Heathen Chemistry is our second best album; better than anything we have done since the end of Definitely Maybe." - Noel im September 2001 über Heathen Chemistry im NME
  • "Musically this album isn't genius. we re-recorded it too many times, Lyla could have been better... that won't mean we won't stumble upon genius because we will." - LIAM (über Don't Believe The Truth)
  • "Listen, before you've heard our new record, I could make it sound like some fucking rock opera. I could make you believe that each song is about a schoolboy that wakes up in the morning and this is the story of his life and blah blah blah. And you would fuckin' buy it. But if you ask me about my record, I just go, 'I don't fuckin' know. It's the same as the last one.'" - Noel über Dig Out Your Soul

über alle anderen

  • "They're just middle class bastards, the Chas-n-Dave of pop. They're a good comedy band. Well they make me laugh anyway." - Noel über Blur
  • "Boring bunch of fucking students. I'll kick their fuckin' heads in, man, because they're dicks." - Liam über Radiohead.
  • "That little twat, Eddie Vedder, I'd like to drop kick him in the face!" - Noel
  • "I'm gonna tell Liam that Henry Rollins has slagged him off. He'd rip Our Kid's leg off, shove it up his arse and then lick him to death like a fucking lollipop." - Noel
  • "What, George Bush, has he started a band?" - NOEL über die britische Grungeband Bush
  • "I don't think there's anything that cunt could say that would redeem him in my eyes." - Noel über Damon Albarn
  • "He's a fat dancer from Take That. Somebody who danced for a living! Stick to what you're good at, that's what I always say." - Noel über Robbie Williams
  • "The Barking Branches! Crazy Conkers! I'll rip his head off, that cunt. Calling me a daft punk, saying that I needed a good fucking crack: You and whose fucking army, you fucking ginger bearded bastard?" - Liam über Mark Lanegan (Screaming Trees)
  • "He's fuckin' cool. Supercool. He's got this wife and she's like, 24. And he's 69. It's like, you've got it going on, mate. You're with the fucking program. When I'm 69, I want to be like you-sitting at a piano, singing 'This Guy's In Love With You' to a 24 year old wife." - Noel über Burt Bacharach
  • "Hole. Just say that word. Hole. If you say it enough, it starts sounding like bitch." - Noel
  • "Well, I don't consider myself to be in the same mold as Michael Stipe. He's like, 'Oh, God, man, I suffer for my art!' And I'm like, 'Oh fuck off! Go and suffer somewhere else, but don't do it on fucking MTV when I got to watch you, ya cunt.'" - Noel
  • "I dig U2 but I don't give a shit about all that fucking fancy stage crap. It's bollocks, really. It's like you don't believe in your music enough. There's nothing better than five lads on stage or four lads...or twenty five lesbians just doing the bit. You get sidetracked and you end up not watching the show with that million pound fucking lemon in the air." - Liam
  • "I was looking forward to doing 'Country House', which would have entailed me going to the toilet with some laxatives, reciting the lyrics off a big lyrics sheet, and flushing the chain in sort of rapid succession." - Noel über die Situation, wenn er einen Blur-Song im Radio hätte singen sollen
  • "Michael Hutchence! What's he doing presenting me with an award?...And what is Michael Jackson doing here, apart from to further his own career? That's crass, man. That fat idiot from Simply Red. What's he doing with 650,000 dancers on stage? Do me a fucking favour. What about fucking Bjork? And PJ Harvey? Annie Lennox? What's she done? Ever, in her entire life? Ever, ever, ever, ever? Let alone this fucking year." - Noel 1996 bei den Brit Awards
  • "All these old farts, slagging us off - they'll be dead and buried by the time we start getting senile and shitting in our pants. And we can remember all their shit tunes. 'I've Got My Mind Set On You', 'When We Was Fab'. The quicker they fucking go, the better for everyone. Anyway, John and Ringo were The Beatles. Isn't It A Pity? It will be when I meet George Harrison. I'm gonna stand on his head and play golf. I'm gonna do me Roy Castle impersonation on his head So who wants a fight? Any old fart who's allowed out of the rest home wants a fight with me, yeah? After I've had me steak and kidney pie, I'll be ready. Do you want it? Any of you senile bastards want a ruck? I'll meet you in the pub, six o'clock. Yeah, it's unlikely, you never know, they might turn up. Whoof! I'll do the lot of them. That should be the headline: 'I'll do the lot of you.' I had a dream where I drop-kicked him in the throat, George, and smashed McCartney from here to Jupiter and back. He didn't have his seatbelt on. My name is disturbance. I love the music. I played the game. Thought I wasn't bothered. Then I thought - I do want it. Keith, Mick and any other old bag who decides to get out of bed in the morning to slag us off. Dirty old nipple. Sweaty old mushroom. I wanna meet you in the middle of Primrose Hill. Thursday afternoon, 12 o'clock, on the green. They say they got misquoted. I won't be misquoted. The main thing we're talking about here is this: any dick who wants it, regardless of what time or day or what shoes I've got on. Anyone who wants a rumble will get it because the man is mad for it and that's the end of it. I don't like fighting but you've not been slagged off like me. And there'll be no big chaps around, man. Just me and me dick, man. And I'll hit him with me knob. I've said I wanted to chill, but I've got loads of knobs picking on me anyway, so I might as well say - 'Let's have it!" - Liam
  • "Hurricane #1? Never heard of them. Isn't hat some indie band with the guy from Erasure in them?" - Liam 1997 über die Oasis-Klone Hurricane #1, in der zur damaligen Zeit noch das spätere Oasis-Mitglied Andy Bell Gitarre spielte
  • "I have heard Embrace. The cunt wants to take singing lessons. I like "One Big Family" but the first one was shit. He was going on in the papers about how "when Noel Gallagher hers this single he'll be in the studio till Christmas". Well, I heard it and it's shit." - Noel 1997 über Embrace

  • "I don't know what you're talking about. But you must be a cock then and by the way, you're wearing my t-shirt." - Noel Gallagher zu James Walsh (Starsailor) nachdem dieser ihn zur Rede gestellt hatte, ob er ihn wirklich in Interviews einen "cock" genannt hätte.
"Don't ever interupt my brother's interview again. If someone says you are a cock, then you are one. Thats it." - Liam steigt in das Noel-Starsailor-Zwiegespräch ein und "schlichtet".
  • "Jack White has just written a song for Coca-Cola. End of. He ceases to be in the club. And he looks like Zorro on doughnuts, I don't believe in adverts. He's meant to be the posterboy for the alternative way of thinking. Coca-Cola man. Fucking hell. And OK, you want to spread your message of peace and love, but do us all a fucking favour. I'm just not having it. It's like doing a fucking gig for McDonald's." - Noel Gallagher über Jack Whites Song für eine Coca-Cola-Werbung
  • "I went to see The Libertines one night at the Forum - I go and see a lot of groups - but I've not felt this since we walked onstage in 94 and it was the most vitally important thing in everybody's life in the room." - Noel
  • "We are not the biggest band in the world anymore. U2, The Stones, even fucking Coldplay are bigger than us, but then, Coldplay suck cock, don't they?" - Liam
  • "I'd still rather be Liam Gallagher than fucking Bono with his fucking Bible or Chris fucking Martin doing whatever the fuck he does." - Liam
  • "I can only speak for myself but if I say 'I fucking hate Bloc Party' I guess what it means is: I hate their music. I never met those guys personally, so I can't tell - but they sure look like a bunch of idiots to me." - Noel Gallagher
  • "None of us have ever been in The Priory, like all these little idiots today. They have one little line, they have one burn and they're all in rehab. That Pete Doherty is cabbaged already. And it's like, 'How old are you? Priory at 27 years of age? You idiot.' Posh boys can't take drugs, man. They're lightweights." - Liam Gallagher über Pete Doherty und Tom Chaplin (Keane)
  • "Da er dazu neigt, von sich selbst in der dritten Person zu sprechen, ist Robbie Williams offensichtlich ein Charakter, den er erfunden hat, und die Musik, die er macht, ist verdammte Hundescheiße. Und ich glaube, dass auch Robbie hier wahrscheinlich zustimmen würde" - Noel über Robbie Williams
  • "My Band doesn't need some corporate fat pig who wears a dicky bow and thinks Sting and Phil Collins are the cutting edge of music to tell me how good my fucking group is." - Noel
  • "Oi, twatty face... You're fucking getting it. Come backstage and meet me, you fucking ginger bastard." - Liam während des Knebworth Konzertes über Radiomoderator Chris Evans
  • "To be honest, to me it looked like marketing – a great way of getting a load of marketing for free really. But good for them. That's what they do, they're rebels and outsiders." (Noel über Radioheads Weg, In Rainbows kostenlos ins Netz zu stellen)
  • "The most annoying person on the BBC is RUSSELL BRAND. I’ve actually been close up to that boy — you know when you mix garlic with coffee and alcohol. I’m just saying when you get close to him, he could do with a bit of Sure For Men, he stinks." - Noel über BBC-Moderator Russel Brand.
  • "It smells like stale urine, and that’s not the perfume." - Noel über Jade Goody
  • "Mark Ronson wants to write his own tunes instead of ruining everyone else’s. He needs to learn three chords on the guitar and write a tune." - Noel über Mark Ronson
  • "The Monkees haven’t split up they’re just going under the name as the Kaiser Chiefs. I done drugs for 18 years, 365 days in a row for 18 years, I never got that bad that I would go ‘You know what, I think the Kaiser Chiefs are brilliant!’. Kaiser idiots. Anybody whose drummer writes the songs are not to be trusted." - Noel über die Kaiser Chiefs
  • "They're middle-class boys worrying about pushing an envelope somewhere, and all that carbon footprint and all that bollocks. Every time there's a polar bear on his tiptoes on an ice cube in the middle of the Antarctic, you know whose fault that is? Rock stars'. That's their fault. Any time there's food running out somewhere-- 'Let's do a gig. That'll sort it out. Let's do a big fucking gig. Let's fly everybody in from all over the world and pontificate to poor people about how they should be saving the planet.' Go fucking kiss my ass. It's very easy to just say, 'We're going to become difficult now and challenge our audience.' I like my audience. They paid for my swimming pool. I'm not fucking challenging anybody." - Noel über Radiohead
  • 1LIVE: "Waren U2 nicht auch da, als ihr dort gearbeitet habt?"
Noel Gallagher: "Ich habe sie nirgendwo gesehen. Was aber nichts heißt: Die sind ja noch langsamer als wir. Wahrscheinlich brauchen sie schon ein mehrstündiges Bandmeeting, um sich zu entscheiden, ob sie lieber Kaffee oder Tee trinken wollen. So etwas in der Art. Also, sie sollten da eigentlich mit Rick Rubin sein, aber ich habe keine Ahnung, ob das stimmt. Und es interessiert mich auch nicht. Bei der Musik kriege ich Pickel."
  • "Ich mag Kasabian. Die machen gute Musik, ich glaube die werden klassische Rock'n'Roll Musik machen. Ich mag die Typen. Menschlich. Die haben es drauf, finde ich. Mir gefällt die spezielle Stimme von Kings of Leon. Das wars." - Liam Gallagher 2009 über aktuelle Bands, die ihm gefallen
  • "The thing about them is that its always compared to The Brits right, and the thing about The Brits is they’re for a certain section of the music industry. There are about half a dozen bands in this room that can kind of cross over there - ‘the chosen ones’ we like to call ourselves - but there’s none of the others that are invited to The Brits here. Y’know? The Rodney Williams (sic) and the Joss Stones and the Scissor Sisters are fucking rubbish. And they know it. Thank you very much." - Noel über die NME Awards 2005
  • "Bright colours and fucking weirdos on stilts? I'm more entertaining than that shit." - Liam über die Scissor Sisters
  • "I'm right into it, because it'll finish off the Kaiser Chiefs and put them to bed. There's nothing worse than a shit Blur." - Liam über die Blur-Reunion
  • "There’s Elvis and me. I couldn’t say which of the two is best.” - Liam, 2006
  • "No way, mate. She's got man hands." - Liam über La Roux (NME, August 2009)
  • "Chris Martin looks like a geography teacher. What's all that with writing messages about Free Trade? If he wants to write things down I'll give him a pen and a pad of paper. Bunch of students." - Liam im NME, 2006
  • "I don't hate them, I don't wish they had accidents. I think their fans are boring and ugly and don't look like they're having a good time." - Liam über Coldplay und Radiohead
  • "They remind me of a band off University Challenge. Like they’re sitting on a panel." - Liam über Bloc Party
  • "She can't even chew gum and walk in a straight line, let alone write a book." Liam über die Idee von Victoria Beckham, ein Buch zu schreiben
  • "It's got to be being in the Beatles. When was the last time God made a decent record?" – Liam auf die Frage "Gott oder die Beatles?"
  • "I’d like to fooking hang Robbie Williams onstage. What’s he done to me this time? Nothing. He’s just somebody I’d like to hang." - Liam über Robbie Williams
  • "I fucking despise hip hop. Loathe it. Eminem is a fucking idiot and I find 50 Cent the most distasteful character I have ever crossed in my life. It's so negative. Eminem's new song about his kid - isn't it the most ridiculous piece of music you have ever heard in your life?" - Noel über Eminem, 50 Cent und Hip-Hop
  • "I remember once being in a shop in Camden and I bumped into a girl who said she was the stylist for Sleeper. And I was going: 'But they're scruffy cunts! Did they ask for that kind of look?' 'Oh yeah...' That's the lowest - if you cannot dress yourself." - Noel über Sleeper
  • "Gorillaz? It's like fucking three-year-old's music, worse than Steps." - Liam über Gorillaz
  • "Take That's Howard Donald said in a documentary that he hears voices at night willing him to fail. To fail at what? You don't do anything, Howard." - Noel über Howard Donald

über die Freuden einer Tournee

  • "I was walking into the hotel and this chair came flying past. Then another. And another. And I thought, it's going to be a good night tonight. Oh, it was beautiful man. I looked out the window the next morning and the car park was, like, full of bedrooms! It took a lot of doing." - Liam
  • "It would be nice to put "Fade Away" back in the set, but because most of the people that come to the gigs now, well they just wanna hear "Wonderwall", we'd be playing it in silence to a load of people going to the bar." - Noel über die "Cigarettes & Alcohol" b-Seite "Fade Away", NME 1998
  • "I always wanted to go to Glastonbury. When you're at home in your local pub and announce "I'm gonna get my face painted like a Panda", everyone goes "what the fuck does he mean? Let's bottle the cunt!" but at Glastonbury you can take all your clothes off and ran around nacked - that's what it's there for." - Noel 1994 über Glastonbury
  • "I always end up playing the same guitar solo over different songs and hoping no-one will notice, but one guy on the American tour said, "hey man, I just love the way there's a whole thread to everything you do!" - and I'm going "How's that then?" - He says "It's the same solo in every song, isn't it? Is that some sort of subliminal message?" - I'm going "No, it's not, I think if you listening closesy, man, it's not exactly the same" - and he's going "I think it is..." - Bastard! Rumbled!" - Noel über seine Lust am Gitarre spielen auf einer langen Tour
  • "Whoever's throwing things like this on stage...like...if you don't like the music, fuck off! If there're any more coming on, I'm off. And you gotta deal with all these people here who are enjoying themselves. If you don't like it, go fucking hang yourself! Don't be throwing fucking stones on stage like this...I don't wanna go blind over some fucking dickhead! This one's called...this one's called Roll With It, dickhead!" - Liam während eines Auftritts in Slane Castle
  • "He [Liam] just starts to ask me questions during the gig. Like in Sheffield, the floor was split into two by this barrier, all these people squashed towards the front, and a big gap, and then all these people behind the barrier at the back. So in the middle of a song, he's going, How come there's a big empty space there? It's like, What the fuck are asking me for? I'm in the middle of this song in front of 12,000 people, you dick. Why don't you just get on with it? You should be doing your gig, you fucker." - Noel
  • "We'll never play the O2. We went there to see Led Zeppelin and to be honest the gig was fantastic, but it was the most soul destroying venue I've ever been to. And much to our manager and agent's disappointment we came back and said we would never play there. So it means we are going to have to do 640 nights at Earl's Court, I would have thought...It's too Americanised for me, and it's too far away. Any gig you can get to by boat that hasn't got a beach is wrong." - Noel
  • Q: Details: What about when you were assaulted by a fan on stage in Toronto in 2008? -

Noel Gallagher: "That had nothing to do with me. That guy was a fucking moron. Why would he attack me and not Liam? C'mon. Fuck me. That's all I wanted to say to him afterwards: "Leave me alone. I write the fucking songs. Fuck up the guy over there with the glasses.""

  • "I’ve been playing stadiums for the past 10 years. Only time I set foot in a theater is to go see a fucking play. No, I don’t want to see anybody’s face. No, fuck off. I don’t want anybody to fucking talk to me between the songs. I don’t want to fucking sign anything for anybody. I’m used to people being a mile away. That suits me. It’s more nerve-wracking playing in front of people who are two feet away from me. People keep saying, ‘Oh, it’ll be great to get out of your comfort zone.’. It’s like, ‘Fuck you!’ Get out of your fucking comfort zone! It fucking took me 20 years to build a comfort zone. I have no fucking intention of stepping outside of mine. Not for no fucker. That’s fucking gone! Fucking comfort zone bastard. I’m in the process of building another one and believe me, I won’t be stepping outside of this one." - Noel

über Amerika

  • "They're wankers. They want grungy fuckin' people stabbing themselves in the head onstage. They get a bright bunch like us with deodorant on, they don't get it."-LIAM
  • "They're off their tits here."-LIAM
  • "I could walk out the hotel and probably stand in the middle of Broadway naked and everyone would go, 'Ah, who's he?'"-NOEL
  • "Americans are crazy. They have this fascination with throwing their shoes on stage. I've been to a lot shows in me life, some good and some bad. But I was never moved to take off me shoes and throw it at the lead singer."-NOEL
  • "I think the American public will always find something magical about five English boys with funny haircuts and funny accents playing rock-n-roll music. As long as the music's good. And our music's good, we've got funny haircuts and funny accents, it's all there, ain't it?"-NOEL
  • MTV: "Are there places in this country that you'd just as soon not travel to?"
Noel: "ehh...yes. Them places where, 'got any barbers where you come from boy? You boy's like country music?' Out there in, you know, them weird little truck stops you get to at like 6 in theh morning, everyone's on the bus going, 'fuck, I'm not going in there'. You know what I mean, he he, the chance of me going in there, there's old geezers with snakeskin baseball caps on backwards, chewing tobacco *pttt*. 'Where in the hell you'd get that accent from?'"
  • Noel orders a beer, the rest opt for lemonades and Cokes. Above us, the TV is on. CNN News. "Have you seen some of the stories they have on here?" Noel enquires. "Check this one I saw this morning. There's this guy who's 75 and he's got cancer. So his doctor tells him he's got about two years to live. So he thinks, 'Fuck it, I've always hated my wife, the stupid bag.' So he kills her. 'What the fuck, I've got nothing to lose.' Then he's put in jail but, the problem is, he doesn't die. He's 99 now and guess what he's doing?" Noel surveys our expectant faces. "Suing the doctor," he cackles. "He's taking him to court," he continues, pissing himself. "And he's saying, ' If it wasn't for what you told me I would never have killed my wife and now you owe me ten million pounds.' I'm sitting there thinking, 'I know I live in a mad country but it's not half as crazy as it is here.'" -NOEL in America

Noel über Liam

  • "Deep down inside even he is a nice guy. Both of him."
  • "Sure I love Liam, but not as much as I love Pot Noodles."
  • "If Liam doesn't like a song, he doesn't sing it, it's as simple as that. Or if something's more interesting going on, like a pub crawl, then he won't do it. Bless him. Lager before music." - Noel auf die Frage, warum Liam manche Songs nicht gesungen hat.
  • "Nobody gets Liam. Not even his wife gets Liam. Who would want to anyways?"
  • "If I lived in America, I would have blown his head off by now and completely regretted it. Since I live in England, though, I just give him a black eye or something every now and again. I don't hate him, but fuck me, he pisses me off sometimes."
  • "If I was a teenage girl, I'd think, Fuck me, he's really good looking.If I was a teenage boy, I'd think, If that cunt can do it, then there's hope for us all. But I don't understand why he appeals to me. Because he pisses me off."
  • "Liam's leaving the band this very minute. Liam's ALWAYS leaving the band. It's raining today so he's leaving the band 'cos it's raining. [Imitating mithering brother] Why is it raining?&*#@! That's it! I've had enough of this, I'm going! I'm sitting there saying [cheerfully] See you then, bye! He threatened to leave in Minneapolis because I wouldn't go to a pub with him!"
  • "I love the geezer. I love him. And I don't say that just because he's my brother. He makes me laugh. He's so surreal."
  • "Is Liam mental? Of course he is. Just look at his hair."

Liam über Noel

  • "I don't think there is a difference between me and Noel. He's a cunt, I'm a cunt. Don't let him spin you; he's a cunt, I tell you. I'm the one who gets made out to be the cunt; but he makes me the cunt. He pushes me to that cunt zone."
  • "I adore him. And if anyone bad-mouthed him I'd rip their fuckin' head off."
  • "I rate him. I don't hate him. How could I? Except for days when I could hate anyone, including meself. He doesn't hate me, either. He'd have nothing else to write about, would he? And he lets me sing his songs. The best songs. I love him. He gave me a ticket to ride."
  • "We'll never split up, we're brothers. And if Oasis ends, it'll end on a high. We might still be together in 50 years." (NME, 1997)
  • Liam: "This is called supersonic."
    • Noel: "I just said that."
    • Liam: "But i fuckin meant it."
  • "I'm a better singer than him. I'm the man, man." - Liam auf die Frage, warum er alle Oasis-Songs eigentlich singen möchte
  • "Noel's got an old man vibe going on, our kid. Big woolly jumpers and cardigans... Terry Wogan, Val Doonican shit." (NME, August 2009)

Liam über... eh, wasauchimmer

  • "If I saw an alien I'd tell it to fuck right off because whatever planet he came from they wouldn't have the Beatles or any decent fucking music. So they can fuck right off, I ain't going nowhere with them."
  • "Of course I believe in aliens. I'm not frightened by them, though, I'm as smart as them. Probably thick as fuck, aren't they? Big goggly-eyed big head, man, they haven't got a fucking clue." (NME, 1997)
  • "There was this bug in my room and I thought, 'you can fook off, this is my room'".
  • "Discipline? I don't know the meaning of the word."
  • "Cunt is a great word. I'm a cunt, you're a cunt, he's a cunt. Top swear word. Cunt!" (NME, 1997)
  • "Because it's better than havin' a boyfriend!" - Liams Begründung, warum er sich einen Bart hat wachsen lassen
  • "I love hearing myself talk."
  • "If a guy suddenly appears before me with a big beard and locks and all that caper and performed some fucking miracle, and then said to me, 'Liam, I am God' I'd say, 'Fair enough, it's a fair cop. I didn't believe in you but fair play, you've got me.' But until that day comes he can fuck right off."
  • "Sausages for sale!"-greeting the fans
  • "Would Jesus Christ have been a pervert if he'd had a crisp packet stuck on his head?"
  • "I wannt 20 kids! Sell 16 and keep four! Take the eyebrows off, though, they don't come with eyebrows." (NME, 1997)
  • "Shoes excite me, lager excites me, America excites me...[points to the stool he's sitting on] stools excite me. Everything excites me. I'm just one exciting young man."
  • "All this dance music these days is that same silly beat going DANK DANK DANK and some guy singing, 'We're all free'when you're not. It's shit. You go round someone's house and they put a tune on, and it goes DANK DANK DANK, and you sit there and have a cup of tea, and it's going DANK DANK DANK. I've got to slag it right off. It's doing my head in."
  • "I'll tell you about the bible-there's no pictures in it. How can you buzz off a book, right, without no pictures in it? You've got to have one picture floating about. If there ain't no pictures in a book, you can fuck right off! I want to see Jesus getting off his tits and smashing the stalls up. I want to see Jesus walking on wine...or whatever, walking across water going, 'Waaahhyy, I'm a geezer.' But there's no pictures to prove it. So fuck right off. There's no pictures to prove that Jesus turned water into wine, I know he did and I know he's a geezer, but a book without pictures is a shit book."
  • "Listen, soft lad! There's a world of difference between a tie and a scarf, right? I'm nothing like those cunts." (auf die Frage hin, ob er sich denn nicht auch ähnlich viel Mühe wie Franz Ferdinand geben würde, gut auszusehen, insbesondere seit er einen Schal trage)
  • "I am a cunt. I can be the biggest cunt in the world, but I can also be the most spectacular person ever made. Depends."
  • "Es war nicht so, dass ich mir automatisch dachte, wow, ich bin in einer Band, ich benehme mich jetzt wie ein absoluter Vollidiot. Ich war davor schon einer."
  • "Er soll machen was er will. Wenn er 'ne Ballerina sein will, kann er eine Ballerina sein, man. Wenn er bei Oasis sein will oder irgendeiner Band kann er das machen. Mir scheiß egal. Er ist mein Junge und kann machen, was immer er möchte." - Liam auf die Frage, ob er seinem Sohn abraten würde, den gleichen Karriereweg wie er zu bestreiten.
  • "My professional job is to fucking stare people out."
  • "I'm a tiger. Welcome to the fucking jungle."
  • "It's not hot wearing a wool coat onstage if you're really cool. I don't believe in wearing T-shirts. I've never worn one in my life. I believe in coats."
  • Interviewer: "So what about the clichee of „Sex, Drugs & Rock'n'Roll“? Is that still something to believe in?"
    • Andy: "I didn't join the band for drugs, or sex. I joined the band to make music." Interviewer: "Sure, I hope so. We all hope so." Liam: "I joined the band for Sex, Drugs & Rock'n'Roll. Especially the sex and the drugs. I didn't want the fuckin' Rock'n'Roll -- fuck the fuckin' music man!"
  • Interviewer: How are you Liam?
    • Liam Gallagher: Godlike.
  • Interviewer: "What are you doing here?" (in New York)
    • Liam: "I just eat burgers, man, and look at the skyline, and I especially like that thing over there, (points to an LG advert) LG -- Liam Gallagher. I made that meself."
  • 10 things Liam loves: "1.me 2.my mum 3.my kids 4.my misses 5.manchester city 6.the beatles 7.whiskey 8.people 9.all the other stuff 10.clothes - 10 things Liam hates: "Manchester United x10"
  • "If you want to make people look stupid. I'll make you look like your grandma"
  • "I am a tender, beautiful and loving guy that happens to slap a photographer now and then because they get in my way."
  • "Gazza (Paul Gascoigne) was at the bar, using that old joke: 'D'you want a 'Roll With It'? D'you want a roll with your soup? So I squirted him with a fire extinguisher." – warum er im Groucho Club in London Hausverbot hat
  • "I suppose I do get sad, but not for too long. I just look in the mirror and go, ‘What a good-looking fuck you are.’" (NME, November 2006).
  • "The bees are vanishing. We'e got to save them before they buzz off. Without them we're in proper bother." (NME, Oktober 2009)

  • "There's too many things going on in our lives to be sittin' round doing cocaine and drinking all day. There's nappies to be changed, there's trainers to be bought and there's hair to be cut. And there's winks to be winked, you know?" (NME, September 2001)
  • "I like the failure, the sadness of something being so great. It's life – shit happens. You've got to pick the good bits and mix them with the sad bits, or the horrendous bits. (...) I'm doing this one thing and then that's it, I'm back on the dole. I'm not gonna be doing films about whales or unkempt eyebrows." (Liam über sein erstes Projekt als Filmproduzent - ein Film über einen Beatles-Film und deren Apple-Plattenlabel - und seine weitere Pläne in der Filmbranche, Guardian, Mai 2010)


  • "Someone was playing a joke when they made me, you know, 'Let's make this guy a writer and a guitar player, but let's make him write with his left hand but play with his right, and let's have him born in the middle of May and give him a Christmas name like Noel, and let's make him a dodgy, schizophrenic, two-faced Gemini.' Cheers!"
  • "If I ever get to go to the moon, I'll probably just stand on the moon and go 'Hmmm, yeah...fair enough...gotta go home now.'"
  • "Who wants to be anonymous anyway? I was anonymous for 24 fucking years anyway." - Noel 1997 darüber, ob er Probleme damit hat, so berühmt zu sein.
  • "God? On Judgement Day, if there is ever one, I'll have to say a few things to that fucking cunt." (NME, 1997)
  • "Football is more important to me than religion. Some of the pop stars I like are more important to me than God, so yeah. I would hope we mean more to people than putting money in a church basket and saying 10 Hail Marys on a Sunday. Has God recently played Knebworth?" (NME, 1997)
  • "Spiderman used websites didn't he?"
  • "I've got a double-necked guitar if he [Gem] starts getting too flash. And then I'll get a triple-necked guitar. And then I'll start wearing platforms, so at least I'll still be the biggest member of Oasis. Then I'll get platforms with fishtanks in the bottom."
  • "Those plate glass windows are just saying, 'throw a chair through me'".
  • "There's going to have to be times set aside for being, you know,daddy, and having fucking chocolate rubbed in my face."
  • "I took about ten lessons, but the woman kept making me do a three point turn outside the local Comprehensive school in Slough and after about three days everybody twigged on that at about half-four knobhead was going to come round the corner in a Nissan Micra with a big triangular L on the top. How embarrassing! I'd pull in and all these kids'd go 'wooooooooooohey....' stalled the fucking car! After about two weeks I got really pissed off with it." - über Fahrstunden
  • "I can run around naked with a toothbrush stuck up me arse - it's my house".
  • "Don't lay a finger on me eyebrows or I'll sue you fuckers."
  • "Spend hours walking around the bedroom with a pair of socks and shoes on holding stuff up going 'mmmmm, ahhhh, I fucking don't know about this yellow and brown!' Your shoes have got to match what colour guitar you're playing too. I had this black guitar and I was going 'Gem, I can't seem to dress with this guitar' and he was going, 'yep, black's the hardest guitar to dress with'. It gets very Spinal Tap."
  • "It's like, it's full of French people, it's lousy." - über Frankreich
  • "The funniest thing was that the Queen's got her own bog at Number Ten, and I've had a shit in it. One of Blair's schleppers let me in. So only me and the Queen have ever shat in that bog, ever. Which is great, innit? A big Gallagher turd next to a royal one, floating through the U-bend." - Erinnerung an den Besuch bei 10 Downing Street und Tony Blair
  • "Shit'll happen when shit happens, and if shit don't happen, there'll be no shit happening."
  • "You're asking if I'm happy? I've got 87 million in the bank, I've got a Rolls Royce, I've got 3 stalkers, I'm about to go on the board at Manchester City, I'm part of the greatest band in the world. Am I happy with that? No, I'm not! I want more!"
  • "If you'd have been meant to have a hole in your nose you'd have been born with one. Yeah, I know that doesn't work, but fuck it! Goatee beards! That's the fucking worst. Goatee beards twisted round with elastic bands in them! Now that's out of order!"
  • "I'd ban all state laws and just have one law: smoke where you want, drink when you want, whenever you want. Get the age of consent right down, legalize all drugs. Kill all the people who like Grunge music, Kill all the surfboarders. Generally have a good time and anybody who wears a cowboy hat should go to the electric chair." - wenn er die USA regieren würde
  • "I came up with the greatest excuse one day. It was actually my crowning moment as a liar. I used to spend a lot of time in my bedroom, playing guitar. I went to the shops for my mum, and I come back and she's found a bag of hash in my sock drawer, a big block of draw. So she says, 'I've just found this upstairs.' And right off the top of my head I went, 'Ah, well, you see, what that's for is wiping the strings on my guitar.' I said, 'Violin players use them.' And she said, 'Oh really?' And I went, 'Yeah, look,' and I got my guitar and rubbed all my strings with pot: 'It makes them sound better.' And she says, ' It does sound right an' all; it does sound better.' And I went upstairs and thought, 'You're a fucking genius.'"
  • "Taking drugs is like getting up and having a cup of tea in the morning."
  • "When Al-Quaeda start targeting limousines, I'm in trouble. Otherwise I'm pretty safe, I'd say." (darüber wie er sich nach den Terrorangriffen auf Londons Busse fühlt)
  • "I didn't spend a year in the most expensive studio in England, with the most expensive producer in America, and the most expensive graphic designer in London to then give it away. Fuck that." (darüber, ob Oasis wie Radiohead kostenlose Downloads ihres neuen Albums ins Netz stellen werden)
  • "I don't know how much money I've got, but I said to the girl who runs the accountant's office, 'Give me a call when it's time to fuckin' curb my enthusiasm,'. Or as we say in England, 'Give me a call when I'm down to my last four million.'"
  • Noel: "Ich habe 107 Gitarren, 200 Paar Schuhe, 4 Autos..."
Spiegel: "...aber sie haben doch nicht einmal den Führerschein, oder?"
Noel: "Na und? Ich habe auch einen Super-Pool und kann nicht schwimmen."
  • "Immer wenn ein United-Fan in Zukunft tankt, finanziert er unsere Transfers." - Manchester City - Fan Noel nach der Übernahme "seines" Teams durch arabische Ölscheichs
  • "If you're not in the kitchen chopping a tomato, you're fucking going to jail." - über das um sich greifende Messerstechereien-Problem in England und das Recht, Stichwaffen bei sich zu tragen
  • "Why would I join facebook? I only have six friends and I'm trying to get rid of one of them."

Der Rest der Band...

  • "Fucking hell, I didn't realise I had joined The Troggs."-Alan White, after witnessing his first Gallagher fight
  • "I've got a chair in my house that I practice throwing out the window."-Bonehead
  • "Guigsy's got grey hairs, Bonehead's going bald, Liam's having a ruck in the papers, what the fuck have I let myself in for?"-Alan White, shortly after joining Oasis
  • "Things degenerated into chaos. By 8pm, everyone was in the bar, there were schoolkids all over the set, and the lighting crew couldn't start the generator. It was like "Alice in Wonderland" meets "Apocalypse Now"". Fotograf Michael Spencer Jones über die Arbeiten am berüchtigten Coverfoto zu Be Here Now